Monthly Archives: September 2012

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Join “Safe Spaces” – The Men’s Collaborative (TMC) Free group discussions

The Men’s Collaborative (TMC) will facilitate FREE informal group discussions that we call “Safe Spaces”between adult men and young adults, teens and boys with the goal of creating positive change in the African
American community (individuals and families).
FALL PROGRAM STARTS
September 15, 2012 Saturday, 9/15/2012 – Saturday, 12/8/19/2012

Discussions will be held at:
The Frator Heru Institute
2227 N. Broad St. / Ste. 3FF
On the 2nd and 4th Saturdays
11a.m. – 2p.m.

A Safe Space For Men and Boys Topics discussed will include:
Exemplary Manhood
Self-Determination
Critical Thinking
Roles & Responsibilities
Community Resources
For more information, contact:~0753031
The Men’s Collaborative (TMC)
Phone: 215-235-1604
E-mail: mail@thefratorheruinstitute.org

Instant confidence trigger – “Extrovert-Me!”…

Extrovert-Me! - Get the most out of life
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Everyone wants a piece of you; you’re the center of attention. When you speak, people LISTEN.

They cling to your every word. You crack jokes effortlessly, and people find you funny…irresistible… and strangely magnetic.

Members of the opposite sex can’t help being around you. Everyone wants to be your friend…to seek your advice… to indulge in your stories. You’re strong, attractive, confident, radiating power and respect.

You’re the top of the food chain— the alpha personality that everyone loves and adores (and is secretly jealous of).

If that describes you, great — you’re well aware of how this rare ability affords you an incredible lifestyle, fun and thrilling social encounters, and opens doors to career opportunities closed off to the general public.

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As a child, you were conditioned to keep your mouth shut (Ever been told by your parents “Don’t talk to strangers?”.). You were ordered to obey authority figures like parents, teachers, adults. As a grown-up, this “learned” behaviour is like a knife to your confidence… and is no longer relevant to your life.

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Your insider,
Dinnah Walton

the black fatherhood challenge-Black Men: Leading & Lighting The Way

Greetings Fathers:

“Asante Sana” or Thank You very much for your 2012 Black Father Challenge (BFC) participation and support. Hopefully, for that investment, you have amplified your own leadership, manhood identity, fatherhood preparation, and life success walk.

Let’s meet and greet “live” –to share the BFC journey highs and stumbling moments, harvest the light bulbs, clarify strategic priorities, spark powerful action commitments, and boost each other’s collective spirits.

We have scheduled meetup in a few cities but seeking fathers and organizations across the country (and internationally) to host a meet-up over the next few weeks. If you are interested in attending and/or hosting a BFC meet-up in your city, send an email to: contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com and we’ll send you all of the materials you will need.

Philadelphia
Friday, September 28, 2012
6:00 – 8:00pm
African American United Fund
2227 N Broad Street
Philadelphia, PA 19132

Please RSVP

Be Present. Be the Change. Come as One. For we are One –Always.

Dr. Thomas A. Gordon

We are One — Always

We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge

IF YOU MISS THE CHALLENGES…..YOU CAN REVIEW THEM BELOW…!!!!

Greetings Family:

Day 90 Challenge: “Leading Your Life –for a Change”

Today’s Opportunity:
We mark the closing, 90th day of this 90-day, “black manhood and fatherhood at their best” exploration, compass, strategy, mini-curriculum, pep talk, and development journey. This trek reintroduced Mother Afrika’s life success philosophy, principles, strategies, best practices, and supports. It challenged us to heal and be healthy through our taking Afrikan heritage –and ourselves –seriously; respecting or “re-specting” or shifting to see afresh or seeing again” Afrika’s best, practical wisdom. We paused to inspect Maafa’s typical, deadly distortions, disconnects, distractions, denials, traps, tricks, and “wrenching pain”. We spotlighted Maafa’s suicidal priorities, pathways, and demands. We lifted up clear alternatives to the Maafa “lure of an unsubstantial life”.

We “danced on the edge” of our leadership and life awakening. We delivered the brotherhood call for all of us to be more powerful and authentic servant leaders, to embrace more mindful and healthy living, and to lead our personal and collective lives –for a change.
Assignment: Go to YouTube.com to see “4 Little Girls”, ideally the full, 90 minute, film or, at minimum, a video summary. See Maafa in September 15, 1963, 122 sticks of dynamite, brutal, savage, murderous depiction. Get to know: Addy May Collins (14 yrs.), Carole Rosemond Robertson (14 yrs.), Cynthia Diane Wesley (14 yrs.), and Carol Denise McNair (11 yrs.). Never forget them.

Maafa takes no holidays: It’s dead serious about our total compromise and control, our decline and dysfunction, our socio-economic and self-destruction. Our constructive commitment and choice are also required. Choose, not denial, then; but conscious wake-up, walk, work, justice, transformation, and love. May these “4 Little Girls” rest in peace –as we and our partners-for-life move in productive power to build a more just, more respectful, more collaborative and magnificent tomorrow.

Assignment: Go to YouTube.com to see “Americans in Focus: Dr. Mae Jemison”, a 90-second clip. On September 15, 1992, nearly 30 years after the tragic and senseless murder of Birmingham’s “4 Little Girls”, Dr. Jemison took the shuttle, Endeavor, to outer space to become the first black woman, physician astronaut to journey there.

Put yourself in Dr. Jemison’s childhood shoes. Imagine the GWS/Maafa challenges Dr. Jemison chose to confront and defeat. Listen to her leadership testimony: The sky is hardly our limit. We are invincible. We can do what we will. No human group has challenged and struggled beyond the chokeholds, achieved the victories, contributed more mightily in record time –once we glimpsed and sensed the breakthrough opportunity moment. We belong here. We belong to this Earth –the universe and stars –and must now assume our rightful place on the world stage. We belong to Now –and to the Future aspirations and life success prospects for our children’s, children’s children, on and on. Birmingham’s “4 Little Girls” didn’t get to achieve their grandest dreams. Dr. Jemison chose to pick up their boldest and brightest batons.
Stuff happens. Leadership shows up. Life goes on. Know that this leadership greatness is never given nor our success guaranteed. Leadership commitment and choice are continually required.

Hold fast to big, big dreams –of our personal and collective re-empowerment, of wholesome liberation, and of a life supreme. Choose this day –what and whom you will serve.

Sponsoring Thought:
It’s Day 90, the commencement challenge. Time flies. Still, we now know that, despite Maafa residuals, we are all also radiant and prepared pilots, co-pilots, and partner astronauts –for life. We’re strong, black men –soaring, leaping with a limp, poised for distinctive flight. When we’re released, like majestic eagles and disciplined, waiting falcons, we’re destined to the sky.

Take heart. Take first counsel from Source Supreme, ancestral, and partner/ally support. Apply Afrika’s best knowledge and cultural traditions. Look all history squarely in the eye –the good, the bad, and the ugly. Never skim. Never flinch. Teach essential lessons. Model the change you wish to see. Hold the children close: Wrap them in the loving arms of your best Afrikan-centered thinking, mind/body/spirit health, and powerful leadership solutions. Never forget: Never lobby for self-serving lobotomies or ask not for convenient amnesia. Never quit. Never surrender.
Let the partnership, brotherhood, and sisterhood connections be productive, refreshing, collaborative, unbroken, and substantial. Show, not just good intentions, but mental toughness, superior focus, courage of convictions, stamina, discipline –and wisdom. Deliver shining star, sunshine, and “soft masculinity” energy as well: Make room for flexibility, for new and more intelligent adaptations, and for the grace-full gifts of forgiveness. Tradition teaches that true forgiveness is direct and down to earth; tender, tough, and plays no favorites. When stumbling blindly and choking competitively on Maafa air, we may develop crippling asthma. Ma’at principles and forgiveness will teach us how to breathe.
Let the world observe how much we respect and support each other. Let’s deliver a love that’s seldom been seen and that will never be surpassed. Let’s be the ones we’ve been waiting for.

Show up for children’s schooling, play and achievement milestones. Demonstrate hugs, healing, and intellectual inquiry. Stop cruising/coasting. Shift the personal and collective story into high performance, high impact gear. Flip the switch. Stir the pot. Shift the mental inertia. Shake up some shucking and jiving shackles: Travel, for instance, to the Motherland –literally and symbolically and take some children with you.
Be ridiculously brilliant –and disciplined. Be outrageously passionate and insanely great. Speak partnership talk –lovingly and creatively, never vulgarly, to our sisters. Tell our sisters that they matter deeply and forever –beyond the distortions or disconnects of yesterday’s stressful moment; that we will amplify, not suppress, their visions and voices; and that their natural health, beauty, and hair are gloriously beautiful –and mean it. Tell our children to practice self-mastery, challenge sloppy thinking tightly held, honor intellectual inquiry, and to think critically to polish this pearl of mind. Encourage their truth pursuit. God certainly need not be shrunk to bearded, white male, iconic status. Let’s refuse to worship and bow to Maafa icons and idols. Why couldn’t God be a black woman, too? Hunger to know what is really going on. Dance with honest, informed, partnership dialogue. Swallow feedback critique wisely: Look for what you can productively apply. Eat the feedback fish, spit out the bones.
Be productive blessings, not burdens. Flourish, together. Look forward to the future: Cherish bright hopes for our conscious, symbolic return through the slavers’ “doors of no return”; for our rightful restoration; for our personal and collective liberation; for our thinking, conduct, speech, and world contributions; for our full re-empowerment; and for our creative delivery and preservation of more magnificent tomorrows. Choose this day what and whom you will serve. Promote a just and durable “amani” or peace. Deliver prosperity, health, and blessings. Seek, not to be known, but to be distinctively worth knowing.

Afrikan Tradition teaches us to that Life is Eternal and that Life, though challenging, is Community. From many, diverse pathways, we are all best positioned for a Life Supreme; when we know, work, serve, and come as One. We say, then, “safari nzuri” (“have a wholesome trip”). We salute our 90-day journey thus far. We bless our continuing, mutual re-empowerment walk. In this spirit, Tradition teaches us to say, never goodbye, but respectfully “farewell” or “tutaonana tena” (“we will see each other again”). Hold fast to this dream and the promise of more magnificent tomorrows: There’ll come a day when we shall all truly see the awesome wonder of our brothers, sisters, children, and each other, again. Be strong for that future, my brother. Be the peace, the Light –and the liberation blessing. Be the miracle in motion –leading your life…for a change.

Re-Minder:
“Let these be my parting words: That I have lived a full life –truly loved, borne burdens well, done my duty, given what I could, filled empty cups and lighted lamps for those who lost their way, leaped above the low and let the weak walk in my shadow, seen beauty in the midst of ugliness, found treasure hidden by trash, and took the bitter with the sweet without undue complaint.” Maulana Karenga

“God is a Black woman too!
Yes, you heard me right
God is a Black woman too!
I know first hand now
Since taking blinds off my eyes
Had me believin’ an old white man
With long flowing beard and blue eyes was watchin’ me from the sky
Marking my deeds and destiny in a forever book
That story never did sit right with me…” Andrea M. Edmonds, She Comes Clear

“Every morning a gazelle wakes up knowing it must run smarter and faster than the lion or be killed. Every morning a lion awakens knowing that it must outrun the slowest gazelle or starve to death. It doesn’t matter if you are a lion or gazelle. When the sun comes up, you’d better be RUNNING.” Afrikan Proverb

We are One — Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge.

Greetings Family:

Day 88 Challenge: “You Are Not Special –Shifting Getting Over & Getting By to Getting Over Yourself”

Today’s Opportunity:
Conduct an “I’m special” self-audit. Identify a time at work or socially that you expected and felt entitled to be treated “special”. Were you pleased or disappointed with the treatment? Identify a similar time that you felt particularly ashamed, guilty, and embarrassed? Did you fear the authorities’ wrath or rejection, peer pressure exclusion, or public humiliation? Identify a time that you felt jealous, envious, hostile, judgmental, vulnerable, justifiably furious and hurt. Identify a time that you manipulated, pretended one thing and did another, fretted silently and pouted, delivered the “silent treatment”, whined, complained, charmed, bribed, begged, “sweet talked”, lied, got by, got over, conned, or otherwise directed and shifted people around to get your way.

Share your “I’m special” self-audit insights with trusted partners to invite their support and constructive feedback. Shift into “psychic baggage” inspection. Place “fear” tags on all “demand and control”, manipulation scenarios. All “bags” are subject to search. Don’t be a Prince Charming con, pimp, prostitute, or male diva. Be really honest –for a change. Heal disconnects and seek authentic self-acceptance. Release the addictive rush and ego props of continually getting over, getting by, and securing modern “slaves” of your own. Hate master/slave manipulation. Embrace authentic social and work, partnership exchange. Trash your “specialness” list and its sponsoring, manipulative desire.
You’re divinely diverse, remarkable, unique, and deserving of love and respect. No one holds your life path, exposure particulars, or destiny. You need not imitate or manipulate. Create more magnificent tomorrows, not “specialness” distortions and more, black-on-black separation. Getting on with our transformative walk, let’s get active –getting over ourselves.

Sponsoring Thought:
Maafa thrives on our fearful, prideful, and collusive dance. It sponsors deep distortions, denials, disconnects, and psychic vulnerabilities. A just love can heal our “wounds”. But “special privilege treatment” proceeds from and only perpetuates more fearful exchange. We’re searching for love in all the wrong specialness boxes. No wonder we show up as masked and puffed up predators on the prowl –vampires, victims, vanquished, and veiled males in disguise.

Our “demand and control” posturing, all “specialness” addictions and plea-bargains, represents a hugely persistent problem for our re-empowerment, vital interests. The belief/infatuation with “approval”, “fear”, “scarcity”, and “separate salvation” sponsor, not more peace, but deeper misunderstanding and bondage.

Naming the specific fear shifts the “specialness” energy and its grip. Ask: What am I most afraid of now? Why do I arrogantly believe certain, specific people must always provide me with what I determine to be my just wants and needs? What entitles me to raise or depress their worth or my self-regard at the drop of an emotional hat –thereby all but guaranteeing deeper suspicion, misery, and separation?
Why do I refuse to be a grown up man, releasing all childhood solutions of manipulatively getting over, getting by, refusing collaboration, and steering “slaves” and “servants” to serve at my whim, bed, and call?

We are One- Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com
Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge.

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Greetings Family:

Day 86 Challenge: “Come as One –Healing, Soaring, Leaping with a Limp”

Today’s Opportunity:

Play a “my life = a sport”, analogy or metaphor game. Select a land or water sport you know and appreciate. Ask: What does it take to succeed or achieve championship performance in this particular sport you’ve selected? List the rules, strategies, team talent/heart/collaboration/unity/supports, clock management, tactical plays, regrouping huddles, rule violations, fouls, gut check times, and scoreboard for winning. Look at yourself through the lens of the sport you’ve chosen: How are the sport specifics descriptive of your life? How is your life “depicted” throughout the lens of the sport? Applying the sports metaphor, finish the sentence: “These days my work and personal life are beginning to feel a lot like….

Find “YouTube.com”. Select/Listen to Al Pacino’s “Inches” clip from the “Any Given Sunday” film. Inspect your life: What kind of “half-time” healing, hurt, doubt, and fatigue has shown up in your life? What kind of mistrust? What kind of “fight” –for what purpose, what victory, what “inches” –is your life now asking you to win? What team, partner circle, or family dynamic is your life calling you to heal? What’s really at stake –what will be the life opportunity lost –if you choose to duck, dodge, collude, quit, or fail?
Thank the partners; who have and continue to show up, deliver support, and sacrifice for your life success. Extract/Integrate the leadership and “manhood at its best” lessons from this sports reflection.

Sponsoring Thought:
Maafa seeks to destroy our unity, establish deep disconnects, deliver violent “wounds”, disrupt thinking prowess, drain our positive energies, and zap our will to fight and win. Maafa agenda and agents are dead serious about our ultimate marginalization and destruction.
Never take life success for granted. Talent wins a few rounds or moments. Championships are hard-fought and character-centric. Greatness cannot be given. Neither can re-empowerment –and certainly not freedom. We must take life’s opportunity and salvation “inches” –healing, hurting, and fatigued though we may be. We must keep our minds clear, our bodies healthy, our spirits resilient, our partnership circles substantial and strong.

No one of us is more brilliant, productive, powerful, and innovative than all of us –consciously stacking and delivering our best talents and effort, together. No one of us has dodged despair, disruption, and disadvantage. No one of us is immune to Maafa hostility. No one of us need walk alone. Fight for every “inch” of your precious life –and our people’s magnificent tomorrows. Heal every heartfelt wound.

We are One –Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

Greetings Family:

Day 84 Challenge: “Standing in the Shadows of Misplaced Loyalties”

Today’s Opportunity:

Find/Listen/Reflect via YouTube.com: The “Tupac Shakur Loyal to the Game” clip affords us one model to inspect what it means to work, play, play games, get paid, build crews, roll loyal, block threats, and thrive on vs. transform the contest field.

Identify at least 1 professional and 1 social scenario that challenged you to trade your principles for some version of the loot, loving, or loyalty “game”. When have you been recruited to the collusive dance? Have you ever had to deliver your best, character and merit-based thinking, put principles and mission success before $$$, and stand in the common sense and ethical gap to do the right thing? Name your strategy and strength: Black man, what made you so strong?

Name the collusive temptations and culprits, the misplaced loyalties run amok: 1) meritless exclusions, crony circles, and non-substantive favoritism; 2) talent smothered and blocked from contributing; 3) protective cover ups of real and suspected abuses; 4) glass ceilings and refusals to put the best talent in the game; 5) blaming, complaining, gossiping, and throwing colleagues “under the bus”; 6) shoddy due process and due diligence; 7) political, self-serving, manipulative exploitation; 8) leader deference and “worship”; 9) flattery and high regard; on and on.

Congratulations: You’ll have age-appropriate stories to tell the children in your closest circle about the times you chose to stand up inside yourself and refused to stand in the shadows of anyone’s mediocre, misplaced loyalties. No trinket and tinsel for you. No pump fake snare. You didn’t bite on all the love collusion can buy and the lure of an unsubstantial life. Tell your story. You’re also rewriting and amplifying ours.

Sponsoring Thought:
Maafa seeks to co-op and corrupt our best talent, thinking, and character. Real black men, not only dance/sing and eat quiche, they stand up for what’s right even if alone. Their “say” matches their “do”. They proactively protect, advance, and affirm life success.
They practice the Golden & Rainbow Rules, remembering to do unto others what they’d expect and what best positions the “players” to succeed. Real men don’t whine, gossip, blame, or complain: They design and deliver promising, sustainable solutions. They heal distortions and disconnects. They challenge collusive denial. They don’t throw partners and potential allies under the bus.
Never walk in anyone’s shadow. The world village needs your perspective and gifts. You deserve your very own leadership spot to stand.

Re-Minder:
“For what will it profit a man, if he gains the whole world and forfeits his life.” Bible, Matthew16:26
“He who throws mud only loses ground.” Bill Cosby, Ed.D., Fat Albert
“Great leadership consists of doing less and being more.” John Heider, The Tao of Leadership

We are One –Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

Greetings Family:

Day 82 Challenge: “Break Codes, Break Silences, Break Bread, Break Dance –But Don’t Break Promises, A Child’s Dreams, & Our Hearts, Again”
Today’s Opportunity:
Find/Listen/Reflect via YouTube.com: “The Julian Curry Def Poetry” clip is offering us a right disposition, right conduct, and right speech solution to some Maafa degradation residuals. Julian suggests that we break Maafa’s destructive premises and codes, break our silent/complicit, Maafa consent, adopt more progressive fellowship greetings/rituals, and celebrate/re-empower our tomorrows.

Are you “tayari” (Swahili for “ready”) or ready for that kind of change? Some folks are all for progress as long as no significant sacrifice is asked of them and nothing really changes. Tayari? If so…

Identify what you’re “tayari” to change in your own disposition, conduct, and speech. This leading your life anew behavior should strike a radical, more empowering “partnership” practice and potential with your brothers and sisters, the children in your closest circle, and yourself.

Specify at least 1 concrete behavior that you honestly commit to: starting, stopping, or amplifying. Set realistic/flexible/sustainable, life-changing priorities and expectations as well as time and resource management agreements. Introduce checkpoints and “cushions” to facilitate continuous focus and adaptive adjustments. Practice your leadership intention.

Sponsoring Thought: Maafa rests, rules, and abides on a colossal lie as well as our complicit consent to practice self-degradation and deep, black-on-black disrespect. The Maafa mind/body/spirit “game” –premises, arenas, rules, celebrity champions, scoreboards, and rewards –is always “rigged” for deceptive “oppressor/keepers”, not “losers/weepers”, victories and dynamics. The Maafa “scoreboard” rings “cha-ching”, when we show up “prowling” and “predatory” – “wolf men”, hardcore cold and bad to the bone; ready to play like we don’t bit more care, rip flesh, rob trust, crush spirits, cut crack and new body holes, spend obscenely, cheat, lie, steal, blow time, drop lines, and tear hearts apart. Maafa also advances when we practice polite self-diminishment and sneaky gossip or corruption; defend self-serving/misplaced individualism as stellar ambition; allow “blood”, fraternal, religious, and network loyalties to trump mindful and merit-based thinking, flee personal responsibilities, cringe amid honest confrontations, abuse/numb our bodies, and shrink from grown man decision-making and dialogue. So…

Don’t say “I’ll be there for you/You can count on it” or “I’ll write” or “I love you”, if you’re wolf man in disguise and don’t really a future in “keeping it real”. Better yet: Under-Promise/Over-Deliver. Show up for guidance, discipline, school, hugs, high 5s, and the child’s dream or game. Cheerlead/Coach. Don’t crush and scold. Spend like there will be a tomorrow, cushioned noticeably within your means. Pay debts promptly. Share the spotlight and the credit. Don’t take or give offense. Rebound rapidly, as partners won’t make every shot. Pay the child support and/or show up for the shopping. Drop the masks and subtle pretense: You don’t really know who’ll respect/love and partner with you, if the real you chooses to “manipulate” all your key relationships through your slick and silver-tongued “representative”. No derogatory name-calling. Laugh out loud at yourself and with others. State your expectations, wants, and needs. Be substantial. Be clear. Let’s build something special together.

Re-Minder: “The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, yet more problems; more medicine, but less wellness. 

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. 
We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life.” George Carlin, Comedian

We are One — Always.

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

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Greetings Family:

Day 78 Challenge: Restoring, Repairing, & Recycling

Today’s Opportunity: Smile, say “hello”, and restore some positive energy throughout some of your most significant work and social relationships. Release deep regrets, the need to judge or critique, and the fear of your own imperfection. You’re perfectly perfect for our village restoration –and, by extension, that of the world. We need your sunshine and shining star.
Fix something that’s “broken” or “wounded” or “impaired”. The “Kuumba” principle instructs us to deliver creative beautification, benefits, and improvements in the world.

Adopt energy-efficient lighting and appliances. Explore “green” energy solutions. Plant flowers. Enhance the landscape. Start a trash recycling program in your home, neighborhood, school, religious or fraternal organization. Soap/Wash your hands frequently and thoroughly. Know your BMI (body mass index) score. Clean up. Clear the dishes and the clutter. Cover your mouth, when you cough. Support organizations that advocate for health disparities and air pollution reductions, ecological sustainability, and environmental justice. Be a strong part of the positive energy, big picture and local, force field solutions.

Sponsoring Thought: Nothing is perfectly stable and endures forever. Nothing moves without significant energy. Nothing shows up sustainably without reinforcing reinvestment. Leaders, then, expect to continually restore, repair, and recycle. We’re world citizens. We belong here, too. It’s our big Planet, our local communities, our leadership opportunity, our home. Let’s get “Kuumba” busy.

Re-Minder: “A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.” John C. Maxwell
We are One –Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challeng

Greetings Family:

Day 75 Challenge: Settling vs. Soaring

Today’s Opportunity: On August 30, 1983, the first NASA, African-American astronaut soared into space on the Challenger shuttle. Today: The Chief Administrator of NASA, a former NASA astronaut, is the first black man to hold the space authority’s top leadership post. The USA’s first African-American President, Barack Obama, appointed this NASA Administrator. Find the names and brief background information for these 2 black male, NASA leaders and astronaut pioneers. Tell children you know about them. Now…

Ask: What do I really want to do, be, see, deliver, or experience in my life? What are my next best, concrete steps to advance this dream? Commit to your life development and success.

Sponsoring Thought: Allow this life success aspiration, not Maafa difficulties and defeatist propaganda, to enjoy free rent in your mind. Don’t worry about final resources, $$$, allies, or victory particulars. Hold only thoughts of your participating, contributing, and serving mightily on local and world stages. Never settle –for less or, for that matter, anything.

Focus/Focus/Focus only on what you want. Don’t stop, not even to settle “scores”. Tradition teaches: One who seeks revenge had better dig two graves. Don’t build someone else’s dream only to neglect your own. Never settle for TV stimulation, trash talking, booze or weed-sponsored comfort, complacent orbits, or someone else’s faulty conclusion of what you should and can be.

Imagine your own magnificence. Then, commit/plan to achieve it. Seek to be all that you are. And soar.

Re-Minder: “Only as high as I reach can I grow. Only as I far as I seek can I go. Only as deep as I look can I see. Only as much as I dream can I be.” Anonymous

We are One –Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com

Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challeng

Day 69 Challenge: Popular Culture, Music Videos, & Maafa Mess

Today’s Opportunity: Go to “YouTube.com” for a brief exploration of popular culture and how it attempts to shape our masculine self-definition, aspirations, “power” pursuits, and male/female dynamics. Find/View: 1) Sut Jhally, “Dreamworlds 3”; bell hooks, “Cultural Criticism (rap music); and 3) Tim Wise, “White Privilege”. Reflect.

Inspect your own musical library, typical musical diet, and routine music video and musical exposure. Diversify, as needed, to lift up music presentations that deliver both distinctive creative content and respectful male/female exchange. Let your musical imagery, lyrics, and harmonies advance and position you for a more wholesome walk in the world. Sing/Play/Dance/Enjoy music that makes you –and us –stronger and better minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day.

Sponsoring Thought: Humans are visually dominant and complement their absorption and use of visual information through sound and musical interpretations. This “human nature” makes TV, film, music videos, and music per se really compelling, if not mandatory, topics for our re-empowerment journey. Maafa never offers up something “neutral” to us. Maafa needs to direct, distract, and continually stir up a big, cloudy, mental mess. Identity and dream life distortions are long-standing Maafa manipulation tactics. We black men are much more than our $$$, conquests, rape/control fantasies, misogyny, booze, power plays, conspicuous consumption, trinkets, car toys, spinning rims, and jiggling body parts. Let’s not allow Maafa-sponsored “media dignity” and glamour-scripted “dreams” to become our core shining compass and collective nightmare.

Re-Minder: “It is easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled” –Mark Twain

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn’t true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.” –Soren Kiekegaad

We are One –Always

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Day 64 Challenge: Healing Maafa Disconnects: Play Fair, Don’t Play Favorites

Today’s Opportunity: Identify at least 3 times in your professional or personal life that you’ve witnessed or experienced significant favoritism. Specify the source or sources of this favoritism (e.g., judgments about skin complexion, school achievements, style, accent, school affiliation, male vs. female, neighborhood, work potential, height, weight, $$$, social status, and the like).

Think about how this favoritism creates artificial advantages for some (perhaps yourself) and blocks or delays in privileges for others (perhaps yourself). What negative impact or “costs” did the favoritism produce? How, if at all, did the favoritism resolve? Ask: “What favoritism, if any, do I tend to show towards the children in my closest circle –and why? Find the leadership lesson. Shift out of favoritism. Don’t play favorites. Play fair.

Sponsoring Thought: Maafa depends heavily on our self-sabotage and cloudy agreements to remain judgmental, exclusionary, mistrusting, lazy, selfish, argumentative, self-serving, prideful, pretentious, and enslaved. Maafa requires our deep disconnects, distortions, and deceptions; including self-deception. Only our active, clear, constructive, personal/collective work and love can defeat/reverse Maafa “damage” and create more magnificent tomorrows.

Healing Maafa disconnects requires integrity –applied to daily challenges. Integrity involves playing to win, justice, and playing fair. It is tempting to try to “cheat” the “Law of the Boomerang” by selecting, grooming, or otherwise tipping the scales to advantage somehow ourselves or someone else.

No one beats the Boomerang. Avoid the favoritism trap: Meritless, non-substantive, mostly covert, favoritism judgments tend to compromise our integrity, best talent selections, team deployments, and audience trust.

We rightfully challenge race, age, class, gender, style, religious, and other meritless “shackles”. Let’s challenge perpetuating favorites. Let’s not do unto others, children included, what we wouldn’t want done unto us. Let’s respect each other and leverage our rich visible and subtle diversity.

Re-Minder: Vijiti vikiwa pamoja huwezi kuvikata, lakini vikiwa mbali mbali utakata tu umalize. {“When sticks are together, you can’t break them; but when they’re scattered, you’ll be able to finish them off pretty easily and cleanly.} Afrikan Proverb

We are One –Always

Day 54 Challenge: We Can’t Find Our Beauty in Someone Else’s Basket
Today’s Opportunity: View Chris Rock’s “Good Hair” film. Ask your “partners for life” and co-parent or co-parents to watch it too. Afterwards, start a frank, loving talk about how you, together, can revise/upgrade your parental guidance and best show conscious love to the children in your closest circle. Craft a new, genuine agreement.

Sponsoring Thought: Our spirits are not for sale. Fashion, rather fleeting, is typically promoted for $$$ profit by people who don’t love and care about our future. Why should black men help or allow these cultural imperialists to prosper? Include hair, clothing, shoes, jewelry, body art/piercing, allowances, movie viewing, car use, music videos, material gifts, and the like in the parental guidance discussion. Describe the standards and budget boundaries that feel right to you. Listen/Partner. Challenge the GWS/Maafa agenda.

Introduce a more wholesome standard –one that honors the natural beauty and worth of the children; one that promotes high self-regard; one that discourages celebrity pretense, envy, drooling, and imitation; one that respects your budget priorities and conscious, common sense.
Why, for instance, would any conscious black man be happy with our little girls and women “masking”, “frying”, “relaxing”, “coloring”, or “straightening” their naturally beautiful hair with the latest perms, weaves, wigs, dyes, Remi or synthetic substitutes, flat irons, and hot curls? There are 1000 ways to have clean, presentable, attractive hair without black men pretending to be looking the other way, when the little ones we claim to love are being routinely tortured and “burned” by our “partners for life” and co-parents.

Why? So that black children and black people can be rendered “acceptable” by way of routine “extreme makeovers” –the better to appear more beautiful, meaning less “threatening” and “nappy”, to society and the latest, white supremacist standards. Stop this sick domestication.
Let’s stop torturing our young people, buying mall comfort, and giving them all the surface glamour, love that celebrity models choose to showcase –all the “love” that $$$ can buy. We can’t buy our conscious re-empowerment and self-esteem in the mall. We can’t find our beauty in someone else’s basket.

Re-Minder: “The most potent weapon of the oppressor is the always the mind of the oppressed.” Steven Biko, South African Freedom Fighter

We are One –Always

Like today’s Challenge? Let us know. We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com
Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge

Greetings Brothers:

Day 23 Challenge: Meeting The Man in the Mirror
Find a mirror, Michael Jackson’s “Man in the Mirror” song, and 5 minutes of solitude. As the music plays, look closely at your eyes –the windows to the soul –and listen to your deepest mind.

Ask yourself: “Am I alive or MIA (“missing in action”) amidst Maafa’s “walking dead”? Am I radiantly, readily alive –full of light, positive energy, gifts, and love; ready now to stand up inside myself for a better tomorrow; ready to reclaim my rightful mind and inner authority for my life’s direction; ready to be a manly man; ready to serve; and ready to change?”

Be strong, black man –all day.

Re-Minder: Many things compel attention and capture the eye. Only pursue that which captures your heart. Don’t just ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive –and then go and do that…because what the world needs is people who have come alive. Dr. Howard Thurman, Theologian

We are One –Always

How is the Challenge going for you so far? We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com
Sign the Pledge. Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

The Black Fatherhood Challenge
Black Men: Leading & Lighting The Way

Greetings Brothers:

Day 44 Challenge: Champion Smoke-Free Living
Be smoke-free in all your affairs –home, public gatherings, parties, family/friend outings, entertainment venues, your lungs and life.
Be a “man on fire” for our personal and collective re-empowerment –not tobacco, smokeless alternatives to tobacco, “weed”, “profiling”, “being Kool”, or “blowing smoke” conversationally to fake productive talk and deliver self-promoting, ego props.
Be focused, frank, and forever committed to maximizing your bodily health, time, social transactions, and life.
Imagining telling a small child whom you love and to whom you are the world: “Sure, Maafa kicked ass all around and still delivers major death blows and damage. What am I doing about it? Well, I’m “on point”, showing up “at my post” daily, standing strong in the struggle. How? Well, I’m…I’m…I’m spending most of my time swapping compliments and complaints, depressed, pissed off, “Kool”, numb, addicted, “high”, nicotine self-medicated, profiling, spinning tall tales, faking it to make it, choosing distractions, promoting heart disease and excess inflammation, ramping up blood pressure, multiplying meaningless conversations, and all but ensuring cloudy self-deceptions and my own premature death.” Don’t “kill” another child with direct or secondary “smoke”. Let’s champion smoke-free living –for a change.

Contact your Day 23 “man in the mirror” and Day 25 healthcare allies immediately, if you smoke or “blow smoke”, to determine a safe plan for you to be smoke-free now.

Re-Minder: “Disease and disasters come and go like rain but health is like the sun that illuminates the entire village.” African Proverb

We are One –Always

How is the Challenge going for you so far? We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com
Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge

Our Spirits & Future are not “For Sale”
Black Men: Leading & Lighting The Way

Greetings Brothers:
Day 41 Challenge: Our Spirits & Future are not “For Sale”

Post/Keep a $1 bill near your Day 4 “personal power” affirmation, cherished photos, ancestor/elder “honor roll”, and Day 37 “calling of my heart” statement. Look at all of these items. Inspect the “almighty dollar” to see it for what it is –a resource, familiar symbol or currency, just “energy” formatted/stored on paper via public agreement. Money shows up, sticks around, fuels exchanges, gains value, drops purchasing power, comes, and goes. Perhaps you can remember times when you had lots of it or not very much at all. And you’re still here.
Think of this $1 bill as a “chosen illusion” and your last dollar.
Never spend your last dollar. Spend within your means and allow some cushion for the unforeseen. Never worship money or idolize so-called “celebrities” who seem to be happy spending it. Never trash friends and family or trade your dignity and self-respect to get more prestige or “paper”.
Never let money define your self-worth. Your spirit is not for sale.
Re-Minder: “Sages do not seek to accumulate illusionary things, but give to others –having more, the more they give.” Lao Tzu
We are One –Always
How is the Challenge going for you so far? We welcome your thoughts, comments, reactions, etc.! Send them to contactus@blackfatherchallenge.com or post on or blog page: http://blackfatherchallenge.wordpress.com
Sign the Pledge. Share it with fellow fathers! Find all Challenge Actions @ www.blackfatherchallenge.com

“It’s time that Black men begin to celebrate their positive accomplishments, dissect the challenges, reconnect, and chart new victories; as we identify, rally around, and pass along the next set of powerful, life development keys to each other and the next generation,”says Dr. Thomas A. Gordon, a licensed psychologist, strategic advisor, and corporate leadership expert with TAGA Consulting who is spearheading the 2012 Black Fatherhood Challenge.

Free Self Esteem E-course – Thanx for Your Tax Deductible Donations to VIWIDA-USA

Empower the youths and women @VIWIDA-USA
You can donate here.. Or you can mail your donations to.
P.O. Box 56027 – Philadelphia, PA 19130
VIWIDA IS THANKING YOU.




Self Esteem Affirmations To help you on your journey

Enjoy –

AND NOW
Free Self Esteem E-course by Dr. J. Rubino

Would you like to discover how to make your vision come
true? A big problem many people face is that they never go
beyond dreaming about the future. Most people fail to take
action – small steps in alignment with our vision that
bring us closer to achieving our ultimate dream future.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Today is Lesson 6: Implement Your Vision!

In the previous lesson, you began the process of crafting a
vision that will inspire and motivate you to live life with
passion. Let’s now take the steps required to turn this
vision into reality. If your vision is a reflection of your
true core desires, you will be propelled into action by the
self-motivation a compelling vision naturally creates.
If you lack this motivation, your vision is likely not
compelling enough, not based upon your true core desires –
but just merely a wish or a nice idea. One way to know if
you are living your vision is whether or not your actions
are in alignment with where you want to be:
* What are you doing to successfully implement your vision?
* Do you have an action plan with specific goals where
day-by-day, you are on the path with measurable, clear-cut
actions and measurable results that you are en route to accomplishing?

If not, let’s create a very specific plan to achieve such
an inspirational vision fueled by your core desires!

If you have formulated a clear and specific action plan,
let’s take a closer look at it:
* Are you totally clear about what resources are needed for
you to realize your vision?
* What are they? Please list them in as much detail as possible.

* Do you know what’s missing right now that if put into
place would support you to be on the path to realizing
those goals that are in alignment with your vision?
* What is missing for your actions to be in sync with your
vision? How can you better ground your plan of action?

* What are the predictable stops, those stops that are
preventing you from moving forward in life, from being happy,
from achieving success and abundance, from being
productive, from having rich relationships and rewarding
communication with others?
* What can you do to break through these stops?
* When will you get started to do so?

As you can see, bringing about success in any area of your
life takes quit a bit of planning! Focusing on the action
steps to achieve your ultimate desires isn’t always easy.
All too often, I see people who possess lofty goals but a
very poor plan.

**It shocks me when I see people plan their vacation better then
they plan their lives! Might this be something you can relate to
as well?

To the contrary, achieving success need not be that
difficult either …especially when you have a mentor in
place to guide you. A mentor is someone who has already
achieved what you want to achieve – somebody who possesses
the ‘success distinctions’ that you aspire to have.

diey, now that you are on your path to success,
it’s time to make your dreams come true. I invite you to
pick up your copy of “The Self-Esteem Book” as I wrote it
to facilitate the breakthroughs that await you as you
implement the step-by-step formula to achieving higher
self-esteem. Having greater self-esteem in your life is the
#1 key required to achieve all meaningful success. So let’s
get started now!

Please visit http://www.TheSelfEsteemSystem.com/1/
and take the first step toward your personal reinvention!

Yours in Magnificence,

Joe

Dr. Joe Rubino
Your Life Optimization Coach
Your Strategic Business Coach

Today is Lesson 5: Envision your Future!

Let’s make it happen now! After you:
#1: Discovered that what you don’t know will hurt you!
#2: Checked your Reality
#3: Healed Your Past
#4: Clarified what’s going on in your life right now.

You are now ready to have some fun – by building up your
self-esteem. Today, let’s cover some specific strategies
that will assist you in upgrading your self-esteem and
confidence from whatever level it is on right now to your
desired outcome.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
so often I hear people say that they don’t
dare to dream about ever achieving their desired lifestyle.
Even more often, people tell me that they do have dreams
that reflect what they desire out of life, but they never
truly believe that they can possibly achieve their dreams.

in order to achieve anything in life, you MUST
be able to vividly envision your desired outcome. In
addition you MUST wholeheartedly believe that you can
achieve all that you desire.

Yes, I know this may sound easier then it often is. So
let’s take a look at how to achieve this desired outcome
with this *crucial* piece in “The Ultimate Self-Esteem Formula (TM)”.

First, you must consciously believe that you are worthy of
achieving everything you desire – as long as it is
positive, moral and ethical. In spite of any negative
feedback you may have received that caused you to lose
faith in your ability to have it all, you can turn this all around
right now.

all great achievements are the result of a
productive, strategic thought process and a series of very
specific actions that cause them to manifest in the world.

Do you think that an achievement such as the climbing of
Mount Everest (the highest mountain in this world) can
occur without very specific mental preparations far before
the actual accomplishment takes place? No, it does not!

Now perhaps you are thinking, I tried goal setting so
often, and it doesn’t seem to work for me…. Perhaps I
should just accept this sad fact for what it is!

Wrong again! Goal setting and achieving what you want out
of life isn’t hard at all! The biggest problem often is
that we don’t set the right goals. Often our ‘goals’ are
little more then wishes, vague dreams or hopes. I’m here
to show you how to set effective goals and take
responsibility for turning your dreams into reality.

The first step in envisioning your future is determining
what you really and truly want out of life!
What would this be for you?
Some of the things I really and truly wanted out of life were:
* The Choice to take part in work that is truly rewarding
and meaningful
* The ability to champion people to achieve their dreams
and upgrade their quality of life
* The Personal- and Monetary Free Choice that comes from
assisting others to get what they truly want from life

since these were not hopes, wishes or vague
dreams but strong core desires at my deepest level of
being, I have been successful. To achieve these goals,
I employed the very same specific strategies that I teach
others to employ. And I achieved success without the
struggle and exhaustive effort that many experience in the
pursuit of their dreams by following these principles.

Now, you’ll want to begin this process by
identifying your own deepest core desires.
* Think about it. What do you really want out of life?
* What do you feel you cannot live without for the rest of
your life?
* And what would make you really unhappy is you didn’t
achieve it through the course of your life?
* How motivated are you on a scale from 1 – 10 (ten being
most motivated) to achieve these core desires?
* What are you willing to ‘sacrifice’ (time, money, etc.)
in order to achieve this result?

Now that you have determined at least one important desire
that you have, the next step in the process is to envision
yourself achieving it.
* What would you do if you knew that you could not fail?
* If you were invincible, how would you proceed with your
plan to achieve your dreams?
* What sort of person would you have to be in order to
achieve this dream?
* What would you have to do step-by-step to realize your
achievement?
* What do you need for resources, and who will you partner
with and receive coaching from in order to realize your dream?

how does it feel to envision your future?
If you allow yourself to step into your true power, you’ll
feel the inner peace, exhilaration, and strength that come
from possessing a positive expectation for your life. Even
if you don’t yet believe that you can achieve your dreams
and ultimate desires, know that this belief will soon
follow your decision to live boldly in the pursuit of your passions.

Getting there is a process. I invite you to not fear that
you must go it alone. Through our books, audios, coaching
programs and courses, you’ll have access to the best
possible ‘tools’ in order to excel in your journey and
ultimately achieve your dream life. I invite you to get and
read what I believe to be a critical support tool:
“The Self-Esteem Book: The Ultimate Guide to Boost the Most
Underrated Ingredient for Success and Happiness in Life.”

Please visit the website listed below now and get your copy
today. I’m confident you’ll love this book and when you implement
its principles in your life, it will transform!

please allow me to assist your journey while
coaching you on the next level!

Please visit: http://www.TheSelfEsteemSystem.com/1/

Today is Lesson 4: Find Out What’s Going On

With the last lesson’s exercise around completing
your past, we are well on our way now to building a stronger
level of self-esteem, achieving more productive results and
creating a more rewarding life. Let’s now turn to examining
our current thought and behavior patterns.

Lessons 3 and 4 go hand in hand because our current behavior
is in alignment with our reigning thought patterns.

let us now take a look on how well we care for
ourselves on a day to day basis. Our daily behaviors strongly
impact our self-esteem levels. The more productive our habits
are, the more we will learn to trust and believe in ourselves
and the stronger our self-esteem will be.

Start taking a look at the following areas now:
1) Health
2) Finances
3) Relationships
4) Family
5) Recreation and Fun
6) Spiritual Development

**********
HEALTH
**********
A positive, vibrant and confident feeling comes from taking
the best possible care of our health.
*) Do you take great care of your physical health?
*) Do you exercise regularly?
*) Is your diet conducive to optimum health or do you
regularly eat junk food?

**********
FINANCES
**********
Having a solid, stable financial situation provides a
reserve essential to feeling good about who we are with
a positive expectation for our future state of abundance.
*) Are you happy with your career, job, or business, or
are you suffering in this area?
*) Have you created a stable financial situation for
yourself where your personal assets grow on a monthly basis?

**********
RELATIONSHIPS
**********
Having strong, productive relationships and the ability to
get along well with others is of crucial importance in order
to experience a strong level of self-esteem.
*) Do you have many rewarding, close and loving relationships?
*) Is your life gossip-free?
*) Do you make friends easily and are they people who really
source your self-esteem, or are they people who drain your
self-esteem?

**********
FAMILY
**********
Family relationships give us a sense of belonging and insulate
us from the challenges of the world. Maintaining strong,
productive family relations nurture our self-esteem.
*) Do you have close, loving, family relationships?
*) Have you forgiven anyone who has hurt you and have they
forgiven you?
*) Do you acknowledge each other for the things that you do you
well, or do you sabotage each other?

**********
RECREATION AND FUN
**********
Taking time away from work to refresh our minds, bodies,
and souls is a critical practice to support us in being most
effective and productive at all we do.
*) Do you have hobbies or passions that you enjoy doing?
Do you take the time to do the things that you love to do?
Or, do you have to work?
Do you feel driven?
Do you feel as though you have to earn your keep, or prove
your worthiness because you are somehow not worthy?
*) Do you take the time daily to relax and recreate?
Do you have a hobby that you love to do? Do you take the time
to balance work and play or do you just work excessively?

**********
SPIRITUAL DEVELOMENT
**********
*) Do you take time daily to read uplifting books or
listen to personal development audios like “The Self-Esteem Audio-Book?”
*) Do you have a clearly defined, written vision for what
your life will be like or do you just kind of go along with
however someone else’s vision of your life is supposed to be for you?
*) Are you in touch with your values, with your gifts and
with your life purpose?

in each area, ask yourself what’s missing that
if put into place would support that area of your life to
be happier, to be more fulfilling and to elevate your self-esteem.

This exercise will most likely provide you with insights
into the areas that need improvement. Since your well being
in these 6 areas is *crucial* for having optimal self-esteem,
this exercise clearly offers some places to look to improve
your life and feel better about who you are. Yet, many people
don’t believe they can or need to improve their self-esteem.
This is unfortunate since most everyone can achieve greater
joy, abundance, fulfillment, happiness, and peace just by
improving their level of self-esteem. Best of all, it is so easy to do so!

This E-course is just the beginning of the journey toward
achieving your ultimate dream life. I invite you to invest
in your future now by selecting one of the three life-enhancing
packages of “The Ultimate Self-Esteem Formula” that are available
for you. This complete formula will show you step-by-step how to
achieve an unstoppable level of self-esteem and therefore a much
better quality of life – now and forever. Make the commitment
now to a better life by visiting the link below to pick up your copy:
http://www.TheSelfEsteemSystem.com/1/

Yours in Success,

Joe

Dr. Joe Rubino
Your Life Optimization Coach
Your Strategic Business Coach
PPS: Learn How You Can Champion Children & Adults to Build High
Self-Esteem as a Certified Coach in Self-Esteem Elevation at
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Note: As a compensated affiliate, a percentage of any sales will go to advance the self-esteem of people around the world.
PO Box 217, Boxford, MA 01921, USA

Have you listened to the recording “15 Myths about Self-Esteem
Uncovered?” Did you share any of the mistaken beliefs I spoke about?
If you have not listened to this important recording yet, make
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give you an instant self-esteem boost!

Today is Lesson 3: Healing Your Past!!

If you continue to think like you have always have
done – you will experience what you have always experienced.
It’s time to break those unproductive thought and action patterns!

By upgrading your thinking now, you will begin to experience better
quality results in your life on a consistent basis.

Find and eliminate the unproductive thoughts which keep you from
experiencing the quality of life that you truly deserve. In order
to do so, we need to start with a process that I call “Completing
Your Past.”

The process of experiencing low self-esteem at certain key moments
of your life is most often caused by unproductive beliefs and
associations you have with regard to specific events and situations
in your life.

Long ago, something happened or someone said something that caused
you to feel poorly about yourself and your self-image took a hit.
From that point onward, you began to see yourself as flawed in some way and so you interpreted subsequent events from this distorted
perspective.

The process of completing your past is a rather extensive process.
In fact, it is the most extensive process in the formula for optimal
self-esteem. This course is not the appropriate place to go through
the entire process, but it is certainly a great place to get you
started.

In order to begin this process, go to a quiet place and make
yourself comfortable. Ask yourself the following questions
repeatedly, until you begin to gain access to some answers.

* What negative early experiences can I recall from my childhood
that negatively affected my self-image?
* In what ways did these experiences influence the person I have
become?
* In what areas of my life do I feel inadequate?
* What are the origins of these feelings?

* Do I often feel the need to strive for perfection?
* If so, when did I first realize I was imperfect or somehow flawed?

* In what ways do I tend to feel inadequate?
* When did I first recall feeling this way?

* How was I overly hard on myself or judgmental?
* How might I reframe what happened to create a different
conclusion that is sourced in love, understanding, and forgiveness?
these questions will support you to begin to discover
the origins of your diminished self-esteem.

Please remember: All transformation begins with the courage to
explore and examine those beliefs that do not support us. We can
then reinterpret how we see ourselves, others, and the world from
a new perspective marked by compassion, understanding, and hope.

congratulate yourself for getting this far. Beginning
the process of completing your past is often the most difficult
step on your path to elevating your self-esteem. I invite you to
give up your right to “beat yourself up” or be hard on yourself for
any mistakes you may have made. Likewise, decide now to forgive
others who made mistakes as you likewise make the decision now to
forgive yourself.

Your success is my greatest reward. Let’s work together to take your
happiness and fulfillment to the next level!
Yours in Prosperity,

Dr. Joe Rubino
Your Life Optimization Coach
Your Strategic Business Coach
PS. This E-course is another tool to be used in conjunction
with The Self-Esteem Book: The Ultimate Guide to Boost the
Most Underrated Ingredient for Success and Happiness in Life.
I invite you to discover all the benefits of the book here:
http://www.TheSelfEsteemSystem.com/1/

This Self Esteen Affirmations will help you ON your journey

How You Can Make A Fantastic First Impression

No matter what type of business that you have, online or off-line, you need to learn certain skills to succeed. You won’t be able to build anything or make any money if you are constantly giving off a bad impression. This is more difficult than you might assume. Even though a great smile is going to help you, success is not solely based upon this. Creating a business empire that makes you money each and every month is possible, but only if you can provide a good first impression on a consistent basis. Do you understand what to do, continue reading this article.
Having a positive attitude can be all the difference in the world. Instead of making a positive situation of a negative one, we are talking about something a little bit different. We are not discussing the ability to find good alternatives to bad situations. This is about your actually looking for the best in every situation and interaction. This will not be seen if you’re negative all the time. Your attitude will show up in your body language as well. The things you say also play a role. Don’t cross your arms or legs, and try to smile whenever you can. Always keep things positive when talking. If you want to make a positive first impression, doing these things will certainly help. It is important to relax and breathe deeply. Anxiety comes across really easily. The more you try to fight looking anxious or nervous, the more anxious and nervous you are going to look. If you have a hard time relaxing when you are meeting new people, learn how to practice some self soothing. Do some deep breathing exercises before the meeting. It’s actually okay to tell people you are nervous. Don’t try to pretend that you are not nervous, as this will backfire every time. When this happens, the other person can become uncomfortable as well. Calm down! It’s in your best interest. Make eye contact with every person that you meet. It’s not necessary to stare at people while having a conversation with them, however. Don’t do it because it will freak them out. For just a moment or two, it is actually okay to look into someone’s eyes if you want to. When you do this, your self-confidence will shine through. By holding their gaze, they will think that you take them seriously when you meet. It proves that you are paying attention and focusing on them and not on whatever other distractions might be in the room. This is a great way to provide a first impression that is positive.
There are so many things that go into creating a successful business. Not all of those things can be done anonymously though. Many purchasing decisions are made emotionally, which is why a positive first impression can have such a huge impact on the results you achieve. We’ve given you some solid hints and suggestions for making the best possible first impression on your potential customers. Yes, of course click here is for real, even if you have experienced less than positive results. For a refreshing change of pace, visit Ejaculation Master where you will be treated to a few explanations regarding Ejaculation Master and Rank Builder 2.0 reviews. So if you are truly tired of trying to figure things on your own, then take a break and end the pain. This does not have to be so difficult, and a good measure of putting the right knowledge to work for you is what is necessary.

Need work that never goes away?

 

When you have a hankering to be wanted, you need a job that never goes away, and that job is plumbing is perfect for you. It’s some of those professions that many people can’t imagine being without. And in many cases if you think that plumbing isn’t that important, one thing’s for certain – when someone uses a plumber, these people require a plumber! For many individuals, until the plumber arrives, they’re left with what’s likely to be an extremely unpleasant problem to handle. So if you want to feel appreciated for what you are doing, plumbing is a good choice.

One of several good things about plumbing as being a career is always that it’s not employment that is going to disappear overnight as a result of newer and more effective advance in technology. It certainly is gonna be popular. Most plumbers are entitled to be are part of a labor union of some kind, meaning that minimum wages and benefits are guaranteed, and you may be reasonably confident about what you are able to earn. With plumbers scarce, it is possible to make more, which can be done much better than the minimums, and still have reasonable tons of employment opportunities at the same time.

Just what exactly must you do if you need to turn into a plumber? Well, the first task is to visit plumbing school. This typically takes 24 months, and you’ll attend the community or a technical college. The most common qualification is definitely an associate’s degree in plumbing, and you may find that you must gain this qualification to be able to join the union.

At plumbing school you may be shown variations of problems, and given instruction on dealing with them. Such as both residential and commercial property plumbing problems. Your course will become with classroom studies, along with other plumbing students, but over time you may generally wind up getting together with an experienced plumber as an apprentice, to enable you to get some face to face experience. Often it’s this real world training which will teach you the most.

In order to train as a plumber, call your neighborhood college to find out what courses they have, in any other case spend some time online looking for plumbing trade schools. As being a successful plumber you are going to always know you’re wanted and appreciated!

For more information on plumbing or plumbers go to www.bucksplumbing.net

 

 

 

Online Advertising Is Actually A Good Selection For Anyone Who Has A Business

When men and women are thinking about expanding their business one of the initial things which should come to mind is online advertising. The Internet is vast, and pretty much every person on the earth today has access to the Internet, which makes each and every one of these men and women a potential customer. There are many ways of marketing and advertising successfully, but none as cost effective as online marketing and advertising. The most significant issue you’ll run up against is finding which approach is best. When your online advertising campaign is carried out correctly you are going to see that you will have the ability of greatly increasing the quantity of money you are making each year.

A lot of folks believe that all they need to do is put a website up on the web in order to carry out online advertising but there is far more involved. Getting visitors or traffic to the website that you develop will mean the difference between success and failure with your online advertising. The search engines like Google are wonderful place to get traffic, but you need to realize that you will need to build your site correctly and perform proper SEO. Building website links to your internet site will be one of the best methods for you to get top search engine rankings, and you’ll also see that creating videos about your website is additionally a good option. After you find an effective strategy of advertising your web site you’ll be well on your way to getting the traffic you need.

One strategy men and women use to be able to get traffic to their web site is by using something which is known as affiliate marketing and advertising. With this technique you get other men and women to sell your products and services for you. To be able to get internet marketers to actually market your website, you will need to compensate them with a particular percentage of every sale they generate. There are many internet marketers these days who have an e-mail list that they are able to send offers to, and this can drive large amounts of traffic to your website. Many men and women do not understand just how much more money they are able to make on their product by just opening it up to affiliates to promote. The product itself should be something that is of demand, simply because if people do not want your products you will not be generating any sort of product sales no matter how much traffic you will get. Affiliate marketers are a doorway to your business, and the more you get, the bigger your business will become.

Online advertising can either give your business credibility or it could ruin your reputation, according to how you do it. Remember that any content you post to the Internet should be extremely informative and valuable to individuals since this is how you’ll improve your reputation in the end. If men and women see that your information is actually a waste of time, the opposite can happen with your reputation. So long as the knowledge is valuable and pertinent to other people there’s a good chance that your visitors may recommend your website to other individuals. Valuable and pertinent information is going to be one of the main keys to a consistent rise in the amount of traffic you receive.

It will be vital for you to do some research before you begin your online advertising in order to ensure that your doing it correctly. For people that are trying to take your business to the next level and improve your income you are going to see that online advertising and marketing may be exactly what you’ve been searching for.

Getting into a subject like online buisness info, one thing that would be helpful is to have a place you can go for some of most legitimate information around. Check out the #1 home based buisness information portal you’ll find this side of the internet.

Your Very First Freelance Client -How to Land One

When you are a freelancer, you can enjoy many advantages, such as setting your own schedule and choosing the kind of work you accept. At the same time, you now have many new issues to deal with, such as going out and finding clients. It’s one thing to start calling yourself a freelancer, but something else to start getting clients. It’s up to you to find paying gigs. Before you can start thinking about becoming a successful freelancer, you have to start by getting your very first client. There are, however, many ways to find clients if you’re resourceful. We’ll be sharing some helpful tips on how to do this. Keep in touch with people in your offline world. This means that you need to maintain contact with the people you used to work with, your friends, etc. After you’ve gone into business on your own, you’ll find the temptation to keep away from everyone quite strong. You hide from the people you like and the activities you enjoy. Your urge is to focus on your work and not on anything else. It is important, however, to stay in touch with your outside interests and people. There are more than personal reasons to maintain this contact. It is also important to your business. There simply isn’t any way to know when the people you know already will know other people who can benefit from your products or services. Use whatever connections you have made both personally and professionally. Get a hold of them and tell them that you have started working as a freelancer. Tell them how pleased you would be if they could recommend you to others. Share with them how thankful you would be if they don’t forget you, as a potential hire. You can help yourself out here if you target your connections. Start with the people you know will actually benefit from your services or whose own services complement what you plan to offer. Your contacts list might start out small however as time passes, it will increase. Share what you know. You are obviously proficient with something if you are going to be going into business for yourself. Why don’t you impart you knowledge with the people you know will find it the most helpful? There are lots of different ways that you can accomplish this. You can offer a guest post on someone else’s blog. You can create your own blog. You can start instructing a class. You can put together a column for your community newspaper. You can reply to questions on forums and to the array of question sites that can be found on the Internet. Utilize your resources and put yourself out there. The amount of freelance success you achieve is based on quite a few things. Typically, it is getting that initial client, job or sale that proves to be the most intimidating part of finding success. You’ve been taught about a few things that will help you find that success with this article. As you keep working and learning you’ll come up with plenty of other methods of attracting clients and getting sales. Most important, though, is that you keep progressing! Yes, of course The Lazy Day Trader is for real, even if you have experienced less than positive results. In fact, that very subject is talked about at find out more, and there is excellent info on buy InSinkErator H-WaveC-SS, as well. So if you are truly tired of trying to figure things on your own, then take a break and end the pain. So that is it – time to be a real action-taker because that is the only thing that will make a real difference.

3 Great Ways to Improve Your Social Media Marketing Campaigns

Even though so many online and offline businesses have jumped all over social media marketing and platforms, the surface has really just barely been scratched. Social media is definitely still in infancy, and you can count on many innovations in the future. This is very good news for large and small businesses alike. In fact, this arena is so wide open, you will be able to test out and learn new strategies everyday. That is one aspect of online marketing you have to embrace and accept; there will always be something to learn.

All the various social media places have their own set of unique social etiquette that you should pay attention to. An example of social media etiquette would be having people follow you on Twitter – proper etiquette is following them in return. Usually it is the famous people who feel the need to only follow others who are famous. It seems like some kind of condition that you have to also be famous to get the follow. In the same way, you don’t want to ignore people that follow your Twitter feed. You just never know what could happen by simply letting people follow you, even if you don’t know who they are.

For people with a business blog, it is important that you develop a relationship with your visitors that is professional. If you have a website, and you do Internet Marketing, it is possible to rank for just a handful of pages on the search engines if you want to. When you are able to post regularly to your website or blog, you can get your site ranked in no time at all. Regularly posting usually places dates on the posts themselves. Although people look at these, you can remove them as well. People that ignore you will typically be following what you do. More than likely, if you are not posting regularly, they will not show up.

Being a motormouth will more than likely get you in trouble. There is something to be said about people that actually pay attention. What you need to learn is to get all of your facts straight, and then address the topic at hand. This principle can be used virtually anywhere, and is not limited to social media at all. Apply this to any type of social media! Facebook, Twitter – it virtually works everywhere. Monitoring the pulse or movement of anything across social media networks like Twitter is possible. Monitoring people or groups would include your past customers, your competitors, and your basic audience base.

As you are moving forward with your business and using social media marketing, remember the concept of leverage. This can become beneficial in so many ways. But always remember to build relationships. You will make become a success with social media until you have a target market that can trust you.

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